


To Feel

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Drama/Romance, M/F - Category, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 06:31:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/794925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Diana plays matchmaker while making her own match.  Jim and Blair get closer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Feel

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THESE CHARACTERS. THEY ARE OWNED BY UPN AND  
PET FLY PRODUCTIONS.

## To Feel

by Brandy

Jim watched as Diana and Blair walked through the small crowd of people on the pier. They knelt and opened the urn. 

"From the sea we came, to sea he returns. May it embrace him as the world never did," Diana said softly. They slowly emptied the urn then set it to float on the water. 

People walked forward to extend their condolences to the pair. Jim watched as Diana and Blair talked with all of them. He sighed. He should probably walk up there too, but he wanted to wait until there was more privacy. 

"They make a beautiful, but tragic couple, don't they?" a soft feminine voice said from his left. He turned to face the woman standing there. 

"Diana, with her black hair, fair skin, and twilight eyes and dressed in white, and Blair, with his golden brown hair and skin, dressed in black, they complement each other perfectly," she said to him with a sad smile. "I am Crystal, and you are?" 

"I'm Jim Ellison," he said. "I'm Blair's roommate." 

"Really? Yes, I remember Blair mentioning you. He and I are...close acquaintances. Diana and I are pretty good friends. And Josh," she paused and almost sobbed. "He and I recently broke up. But it still hurts." 

"You're a man!" Jim hissed. 

"You don't think anything that looks this good could be natural, do you?" she smiled to take the sting from her words. "Thank you. You just paid me the best compliment." 

"You're welcome," Jim said belatedly. 

"I should go. It was nice meeting you. I just wish it had been under better circumstances," she sighed and walked away. After she...uh he left, people started to leave. After awhile, it was just Diana and Blair at the end of the pier. They were holding each other. 

"They could be posing for a picture," Simon said from just behind him. 

"Huh." 

"They're so still. They could be posing for a picture," Simon turned toward him. "Are you all right?" 

"Yeah. I just don't know what to say to him right now," Jim sighed. This time it was from frustration. He looked back at the couple. Diana pulled away from Blair. They stared at each other for a minute. Then she started walking back toward them. 

"Simon, can you take me home?" she asked softly. 

"Yeah, just let me get the car." 

She turned toward Jim. "He needs you now more than he needs me. Go to him." 

"I don't know what to say to him," Jim said sadly. "I've never been in this kind of situation before. I've never had to comfort some one I ... care about." 

"Then don't say anything at all," she said softly as she turned away to join Simon. 

He has to come through for Blair now, she thought. If he doesn't, their chance will not come again for a long time. She sighed as she got into the car. 

"Simon, instead of taking me back to my place can we go to a cafe or something?" Diana asked. 

"Sure that's no problem for me." 

They parked beside a small cafe near the university. After they were seated and had order their coffees, Diana sighed. 

"Did you know that Josh made me promise never to look into his future? He made me promise about a day after I told him what I could do. I keep thinking that may be if I had broken my word he would still be alive," she wiped at the tears that were silently falling down her cheeks. "But I know if I had, I would never have been the kind of friend he wanted me to be. I would not have been the person I wanted to be," she sobbed. "Should I have been so selfish?" she asked breathlessly. 

Simon reached out and took one of her hands. "You kept your promise. You did exactly as he asked. You were his friend to the end." 

Diana smiled through her tears. "I was, wasn't I?" she said as she covered his hand with her other hand.   
  


* * *

Jim walked toward Blair. He smiled sadly to himself. He just looked so tragic, standing there at the end of the pier staring out at the ocean. He thought about what Diana had said. Now that he was walking toward Blair, her advice made more sense. 

All he wanted right now was to bundle Blair up in cotton and never let him be hurt again. He knew that was impossible. That was what had started this in the first place. If he hadn't wanted to protect Blair so much, they might not be here today on this pier. 

Even as he made his decision about what he was about to do, he was aware that Blair could reject him. Hell, he almost expected him to, but he had to take that chance. 

He walked up behind Blair and wrapped him in his arms.   
  


* * *

Blair stared at the urn as it floated away. He could feel Diana's tears on his neck as he held her. He didn't feel anything. He could feel this lump in his chest. What used to be his heart just didn't want to feel any more. 

When Diana pulled away from him and looked up, all he could do was stare at the tears drying on her cheeks. He knew she was wondering why he wasn't crying. He was wondering the same thing. She smiled at him. It was a beautiful smile, but he just couldn't seem to smile back. 

She pulled away from him slowly and walked back toward the shore. He turned back to the ocean and watched the waves slowly carrying the urn out to see. He didn't notice how long after that he stood there. But he sensed Jim behind him before Jim said anything. 

He tensed slightly. He waited to hear the platitudes and well meant words. But Jim surprised him. Jim wrapped his arms around him and held him as though he were never going to let go. 

Blair cried. For the first time since the night Josh died, he left the hurt out. And it was good.   


A week later....

Blair was just getting out of the bathroom as Jim came down from changing into some sweats. 

"Thank God it's Friday," Jim said as he followed Blair into the kitchen. 

"Amen. Still tacos tonight, right?" Blair asked as he dug into the refrigerator. 

"Yep, unless you've been hoarding food, that's all that's left remember?" 

Blair just laughed and started browning the ground beef. 

As Jim and Blair worked together on the meal, Jim reflected on the past week. It had been slow really, just paperwork, but it had seemed more stressful. He knew why. The "our house rules" had taken a little getting used to. It seemed as though he'd had more housework to do to keep up his part of the bargain. 

That thought made him feel guilty. But as he promised himself again that he would never treat Blair that way again, he started to lighten up. Tonight was Friday night. This was the night that he and Blair would fix supper together. Tomorrow morning he and Blair would go grocery shopping together. 

The only thing wrong with the new rules was that now Blair was paying rent. Not much really, but it still made him feel bad that Blair had insisted on paying rent. On the up side, Blair seemed more relaxed, or rather as relaxed as could be believed under the circumstances.. 

As they sat down to eat, Jim and Blair talked about their day and their week. They talked about what they were doing next week. They put together a shopping list for the next morning. Jim couldn't help but smile as they washed dishes. It was so domesticated.   
  


* * *

Blair smiled in the dark. Things were a lot more equal around here. He and Jim had worked out a schedule on when the house work was done, and they were taking turns at each task. It all seemed a little bit easier somehow. 

He nearly laughed aloud when he remember the look on Jim's face when he insisted on paying rent. Now that he was, he felt more at home. He jerked, startled. That's what this place was, he realized, it was home.   
  


* * *

"Hello." 

"Hello, Jim, is Blair there?" Diana asked. 

"No, he left..." 

"Good, I wanted to know how he's doing." 

Jim was startled. "He's doing all right under the circumstances. Why?" 

"I just wanted to make sure you knew he was alright," he heard her sigh. "Jim may I be, as my grandmother used to say, as blunt as a spoon." 

"Sure, Diana. You're going to be anyway." 

Diana laughed. "You're right. Any way, have you started wooing Blair, yet?" 

"Excuse me?" 

"Wooing, as in to court, to date, to shower affection on. Now, I suggest you do this slowly. This has to sneak up on him before he's aware he's being hunted," Diana told him. 

Jim laughed. "You make this sound like war." 

"Well it is, you ass. I'm being very serious here. If you want Blair, my advice is this: sneak up on him and grab him when he's not looking." 

"Good-bye Diana." 

"Good-bye JIm, and good hunting."   
  


* * *

Later that night the phone rang. Jim answered. 

"Hello, is Blair Sandburg here?" a deep male voice answered. 

"No, you just missed him." 

"Oh, well sorry." Click. 

Jim dialed Diana's number. 

"Diana's Den of Iniquity. Madam speaking." 

"What were you saying before? About wooing Blair?" 

Diana laughed.   


Phone conversations over the next month

"...the music was a good idea. He looked at me kind of strange but I think he likes it." 

"Of course, he does. Now you need to invite him out. To a movie or something, but don't offer to pay not yet. He should have enough money." 

"The movie idea is a good one. When should I offer to pay though?" 

"When he says he can't go because he's broke. He won't refuse the help then." 

"Makes sense, thanks Diana." ...... 

"Now, you should start getting a little touchy-feely. Not any thing groping, just subtle touching. Remember you're hunting him." 

"Are you sure?" 

"Who's more experienced at this?" ...... 

"Hello, is Blair in?" a deep male voice asked. 

"Yeah, hang on. Blair!" ...... 

"I feel like I should step up the pace a bit. He called again." 

"No, not yet, it's only been three weeks. Tell you what though. This weekend take him to the movies. It's the end of the week, so he won't be able to pay. Put your arm around him or something. Subtly, but a definite gesture." 

"I don't know..." 

"Exactly, listen to me all right?" 

"O.K."   
  


* * *

Thank God the movie was almost over, Blair thought. Jim's accidental touching was wearing on his nerves. Maybe he should go all the way with James. God knew he needed to blow off some steam. He gave a little sigh of relief when the lights came up. 

"Didn't you like the movie?" Jim asked as he walked behind him up the aisle. He put his arm on Blair's shoulder. 

Blair felt the touch clear to his toes. Warm and heavy, just like the man himself would probably be. Down, boy, down, he thought to himself. He cleared his throat. "It wasn't quite what I expected." 

"Oh, well do you want to go for some coffee?" Jim asked as they left. 

"No, that's all right," Blair said as he stopped to zip up his jacket. 

"O.K." Jim said as he put an arm around Blair's shoulders. Jim sighed. It felt so good to do that finally. It was a warning to everyone else that Blair was his as much as it was to keep Blair warm. 

Blair almost tripped. Jim. Put. His. Arm. Around. Me. By the time the thought made it through his head, they were at the truck. Jim unlocked and opened his door first. Blair slid in. He was still getting over the shock. He had to talk to Diana.   
  


* * *

"Diana, he put his arm around me in public. Like I was his girlfriend or something. What does this mean?" 

"Maybe he's trying to date you in the least conspicuous way. Jim is probably afraid of rushing into things so he's trying to make sure any decision you make is you're own and not what you think he wants you to do." 

"Are you sure?" 

"Of course." 

"Damn it. I was supposed to meet James half an hour ago. He's going to kill me. I think I should stop seeing him. What do you think?" 

"What ever you think is best, Blair." 

"You're probably right. If I stop seeing him now then no one will get the wrong idea. Thanks, Diana." 

"No problem," she said as she hung up the phone. Two strong arms grabbed her from behind and pulled her back into bed. 

"You know matchmaking is going to get you into trouble." 

"Simon, they were meant to be. If not now, then later. But the problem is they are going to need each other later. It's better if they have time to get used to it." 

"What ever," Simon said just before he kissed her.   
  


* * *

  


"So I hear you're meeting Daryl today," Blair said as Diana walked up to Jim's desk. 

"Yeah, I'm here to pick them up. Is Daryl here yet?" Diana asked shakily. 

"He and Simon are talking in Simon's office. He told me to tell you he will be right out," Blair said with a frown. "Are you all right?" 

"Yeah, just a little nervous. I've never met someone's *son* before. This is a big deal for Simon. He wants us to like each other. Any way, what are you doing this weekend?" Diana asked with a smile. As if she didn't already know. 

"Jim and I are going camping. We're going to go to this site I heard about. It actually has a hot spring," Blair enthused. "What are you doing this weekend?" 

"I am going to cook for Simon Friday night, other than that I'm pretty much free," Diana smiled. "But maybe Simon will come up with something for us to do." 

They heard the door open and they both turned around at the same time. Daryl stopped in the doorway when he caught a glimpse of Diana. His eyes widened in shock then a look of cool disdain settled over his features. 

"Oh Goddess, give me strength," Diana whispered softly. 

"It'll be o.k." 

Diana laughed. It was a bright brittle laugh. "I'll call you later o.k. After I finish picking the icicles off my nose." She walked toward Simon and Daryl. 

"So you're her," Daryl said in a hard voice. 

"My name is Diana, yes," Diana said in polite, cool voice. Then she smiled at him, really turning up the wattage. "You must be Daryl. I have heard so much about you. Your father is very proud of you." 

Daryl brushed past her just hard enough to make her stumble. 

"Oh, I can tell this is going to be a wonderful lunch," Simon sighed as he took Diana's hand in his.   
  


* * *

  


"Hello," Jim said as he answered the phone. 

"Jim, do I have 'beat up on me because I'm a white southerner tattooed on my forehead'?" Diana asked with a huff. 

"No," Jim paused, "is this about lunch today?" 

"If Daryl doesn't tone down the 'you're just a white trash bitch' attitude, he and I are going to fight. And its not just his attitude. He really hurt Simon today, and that is absolutely unforgivable! Sorry, I just needed to get that out. How are you?" Diana asked. 

"Fine." 

"I hear you're going on a camping trip tomorrow after work. Who's idea?" Diana asked. 

"Blair's, why?" Jim asked with a frown as he looked over toward his roommate. Blair was fixing dinner and hadn't heard him. 

"Good. How is Blair by the way?" 

"He's better," Jim said softly. Then very softly, "He laughed today. I could have cried," Jim's breath caught. " He's hasn't laughed in a month." 

"Thats...BEEP...I want to talk to him." 

"Just a second, there's someone on the other line," Jim clicked over. "Hello." 

A low, angry male voice said, "Can I speak to Blair?" 

"Sure, Blair phone!", he said as he walked toward the kitchen. "Diana's on the other line waiting to speak to you." 

"What is it, James?" Blair said softly. "I told you I didn't want to see you anymore....We just weren't clicking....I'm not going to go over this again, there just were not any sparks. Good bye, have a nice life." Click. "Diana, how was lunch?" 

Jim smiled. Life was good.   
  


* * *

  


Simon knocked on the door. Diana opened it and gave him a hello kiss. It quickly turned into something different. Something slow, wet, and entirely inappropriate for her front porch. 

"Come inside," she said breathlessly and pulled him in. She smiled. "Do you want to grill steaks now or eat cold cuts later?" 

"How about," Simon pulled her into his arms, "we eat cold cuts later and grill steaks tomorrow?" He pulled her in for another of those devastating kisses. The way he kissed, she thought faintly, should be outlawed. It was slow, wet, tender, and full of teeth and tongue. He outlined her lips, sucked the lower one, and then dove back into her mouth to taste even more of her sweetness. 

She could taste the orange he's had for his lunch and smell his arousal. It was musky, but sharp, different from anyone else's she had ever smelled. She smiled into the kiss. Then again Simon never wore cologne or scented products. He was allergic to all sorts of fragrances. Just then Simon put a hand on her right breast and began to gently tease the nipple. Every semblance of coherent thought ceased, and she moaned. 

Simon smiled to himself as he nuzzled her neck. Diana was the most responsive woman he had ever been with. It was an incredible ego boost to know that he made her incoherent with just a kiss. Then Diana's lips began to suckle at his ear, and his own mind went blank. 

Soon they were on the floor. Clothes off and heaped on the floor. Simon was suckling at Diana's breasts, teasing her as he pulled at them with lip covered teeth. Her moans drowned out the sound of his raging heartbeat. 

He slowly kissed his way down her arching body. As he tongued her navel, she began to plead with him. 

"Oh Goddess, Simon, please stop teasing. Just do it," Diana panted. 

"Do what?" 

"What ever Simon, just do something!" 

Simon smiled against her thigh. He parted her thighs and tasted her. She arched into the air. 

"OOOOHHHH Goddess," she cried as she came. She went limp. 

Simon sort of collapsed for a minute between his legs. He managed to maintain control of his body as the waves of her pleasure echoed through his mind. It was the weirdest and most erotic sensation, and it was only the third time they had made love that he had managed to control himself when it happened. 

He fumbled for a condom. She took it from him. He was vaguely shocked that her hands weren't shaking. He almost came when she put it on him. 

She grinned up at him. "There, now fuck me." 

He slid into her, body and mind. He stroked into her slowly, feeling her pleasure and his as well. It was insanity, chaos, love. A few more strokes and they both came and passed out from the intensity of the pleasure they had shared.   
  


* * *

  


The tent was set up. The down (sp?) insulated sleeping bags were laid out. The hot dogs had been roasted and eaten. They were sitting side by side watching the fire. They were sitting as close as they could without touching. 

Can this be for real? Blair thought to himself. Could Jim really want *me*? Straight-as-an-arrow Jim couldn't possibly want me. But all the signs are there. 

Could he really want me? Jim thought. There must be men out there who have fought over him. Men more handsome, men with more hair, he thought as he ran his hand over what he had left. 

Should I put my head on his shoulder? 

Should I put my arm around his shoulders? 

"Jim..." "Blair..." they said at once. 

"Go ahead," Jim said softly. 

"I...uh...was just going to say that I was going to go to bed. Good night." Coward, Blair thought. "

I'll be along after I bank the fire." Cowardess doesn't suit you Ellison, Jim thought.   
  


* * *

  


It was pitch black inside the tent, and even he almost couldn't see. Jim stripped down to his thermal underwear and crawled inside his sleeping bag. He sighed and rolled onto his back. 

He could feel Blair's body heat warming the left side of his body. He knew that Blair was awake, because his heart rate was increasing. 

"Blair, is something wrong?" 

"Uh, no. I'm just thinking about tomorrow. Soaking in that hot spring will be pretty relaxing, don't you think?" Hard muscles, rippling biceps beading with water, mind numbing sensation enhancing hot water bubbling. Blair rolled away from Jim and curled into a ball. "I'll try not to keep you up." 

"That's all right, Chief. I understand." Water beading on eyelashes, wet slick lips, damp hair curling from the steamy heat. Jim turned away from Blair with an almost inaudible moan. "Good night." 

"'night."   
  


* * *

  


Blair hiked toward the hot spring that Jerry had told him about. He knew that Jim was off taking a walk, because Jim had left him a note. He figured he had enough time to take a quick dip. He had even brought some towels and extra underwear. 

He almost walked right into it. It was sunk into a rock basin and surrounded by lush ferns. Blair quickly sat his pack down on a nearby rock and began to disrobe.   
  


* * *

  


"Simon, he just doesn't like me." 

"I know that," Simon rolled over and got up. "I just don't understand it," he rubbed the bridge of his nose. 

"I do. I want to take him out to lunch next weekend. Just the two of us. I think we can work out our differences then," Diana said as she put her arms around him. Suddenly she stiffened then relaxed. 

Simon turned toward her and saw her grin. He smiled. "What is it?" 

"Let's just say we don't have to worry about Blair and Jim getting together anymore. It's almost a foregone conclusion." 

"And how do you know that?" Simon said with a grin. 

"Twilight eyes," she whispered as she kissed him.   
  


* * *

  


Jim walked quickly through the woods. He was still hard from this morning. He sighed. When he had woke up this morning, he and Blair had been as close to each other as possible and still be in their own sleeping bags. He had been so hard and hot enough to melt steel. 

He had just wanted to take Blair. No seduction, no *subtly*, he thought. What would Diana have thought? He chuckled, then stopped abruptly. Through a break in the trees he could see Blair. He had put his backpack down, and he was fiddling with his shirt. 

Jim watched in fascination as Blair pulled his shirt off. Dark, golden brown skin dusted with light hair was revealed to him. His nipples stood out. They were a dusky tan color, and as Jim focused on them, he discovered a small freckle above the right one. 

Jeans came off next, then long underwear. His ass was perfect, Jim thought. It was rounded, and muscled, and it looked absolutely edible. He watched as Blair lowered himself into the spring with a sigh. 

He turned away. Oh god, what was he going to do? He looked down at himself. Did he dare go over there like this? he thought as his aching erection got even harder. He looked back up as he heard a small splash. Blair had ducked under the water to wet his hair. Water streamed from it and beaded on his face, on those luscious lips, on his eyelashes. Jim felt himself being drawn toward the spring and Blair.   
  


* * *

  


Blair sighed as he felt the hot water filter through his hair. This was a very good idea, he thought. Suddenly he heard a branch snap. 

"Who's there?" he said as he sat up quickly. 

"It's just me. I saw you walking up this way and decided to see what you were up to," Jim said in what he hoped was a normal voice. "Do you mind if I join you?" 

"No problem. There's plenty of hot water for you, too." 

Jim chuckled as he took off his coat. He looked down as he undressed. He didn't see Blair. 

Blair stared at the continent that was Jim's chest. The muscled were hard, and they rippled with each movement. Jim turned away from him as he removed his jeans. Blair almost whimpered. Oh god that ass. That ass was beautiful. Hard and rounded, muscled was a better term for it. Blair closed his eyes and missed seeing Jim's erection as he slipped into the water. 

Jim sighed with relief. The water was only on this side of boiling. He felt his skin flush, and his tense of touch became slightly numbed. 

"Blair, this is going to sound weird, but I think this water is effecting my sense of touch." 

"Really," Blair's eyes popped open, "how do you mean?" 

"It feels numbed somehow. Go ahead touch my foot or something." 

Blair did. 

"I can feel it, but I can't feel the blood pumping through you or the muscles contracting as they pick up my....hey" 

Blair dunked him. Then as Jim fought his way back up, Blair started climbing out of the spring. Jim came out of the water and grabbed him around the waist and dunked them both. When they came up for air, Blair was facing him, and Jim had his hands at Blair's waist. 

They stared at each other. It was a look full of longing and love. Slowly, they came together in a kiss, and the world exploded. 

Jim could taste coffee and bagel and something that was *Blair*. Blair's tongue seemed to be everywhere: licking the corners of his mouth, skimming along his teeth, playing with his tongue. Finally, Jim caught Blair's tongue and sucked on it strong and slow. 

Blair was going into a sensory overload. The big guy seemed content to suck on Blair's lower lip while he explored Jim's mouth, but then he began sucking on his tongue, and Blair melted. 

Jim felt Blair start sliding down his chest. He came up for air and looked around for a place to stretch Blair out. There was a partially submerged rock overhanging the water. It was warm and big enough both of them. 

Blair felt the world tilt and right itself as Jim boosted him out of the water and onto a rock. It was warm and the air was chilly. Blair shivered. Then suddenly Jim was beside him, laying him back across the rock. He looked up into Jim's eyes and was surprised to see a frown. 

"Second thoughts?" Blair asked shakily. Please say no. 

"No, but I haven't done anything like this since high school, and even then it was only some heavy petting," Jim said as he began kissing Blair's neck. "I want this to be good for you." 

"As long as you're the one doing it, I would love anything you do," Blair said softly as he began stroking and massaging Jim's back and felt some of the tension dissipate. 

Jim kissed his way down to Blair's nipples and began to alternate between them. He would suckled one and toy with the other with his fingers. He couldn't get enough of Blair's taste. Blair's nipples were very similar, but just different enough that Jim knew he could tell them apart in the dark. 

Blair moaned and arched. His nipples were almost as hard as his cock, and Jim showed no signs of letting up. He moaned again and began to whisper "pleasepleaseplease" over and over. 

Jim slowly worked his way down Blair's body. By the time he touched Blair's cock, he was in a frenzy. Jim took Blair into his mouth and sucked. Blair screamed and came. 

Blair just couldn't hold on; it had been too long, and Jim was just too good. 

"Sorry," Blair gasped. "You're just too good." 

Jim smiled and kissed Blair. Blair could taste himself on Jim's lips. 

"I don't mind. I love your taste." 

Blair sighed. "I'm all wiped out, (pant) but I will see what I can do about this (pant) cruise missile that's (pant) drilling a hole in my hip." 

He reached down and slowly began to stroke Jim. Jim groaned and arched even harder against Blair. "Just let go for me, baby," Blair whispered. Jim groaned again and came in thick spurts. Blair raised his hand to his mouth, and Jim groaned again as Blair licked his fingers. 

"I like your taste, too, big guy." 

Jim managed to get up, and he pulled Blair up after him. "Let's get back to the tent." 

"I'm all for it," Blair said as he turned toward his back pack. 

Jim pulled him back and kissed him hard. "Now, I'm ready to go."   
  


* * *

  


Blair dropped his back pack and leaned over. He panted for a minute then looked up. Jim was building up the fire. 

"You were kind of in a hurry to get back, weren't you?," Blair said as he squatted beside Jim. 

Jim turned toward him and grinned. "I wanted to get back and light the fire," Jim said before pulling Blair toward him and kissing him. He suddenly pulled back. "What the hell was that? Did you feel that?" 

Blair stared at him in shock. 

"Blair...Blair, what was that?" Jim asked desperately. He had felt...the weirdest sensation. Almost like he was feeling what Blair was feeling. 'A Sentinel and his Guide become sensitive to each other in a way that is almost paranormal.' "Blair?" 

"I'm going for a walk," Blair said as he stood. 

"Right now? We have to talk," Jim stood. 

"Yes, we do, but first I have to think. I won't go to far, and I'll be back before dark," Blair turned back toward Jim and saw the concern in his eyes. "I promise that I'll be back, and I promise this doesn't change anything. I just need to straighten my head out, o.k.?" 

"I'll be here waiting."   
  


* * *

  


Blair walked along the same path he had taken earlier that morning. He didn't notice the scenery or the animals. He was reviewing his life. Blair knew he would have to tell Jim most of it. He would have to because he also knew he couldn't hide anything through the link that had formed between himself and Jim. Suddenly, he stopped. If he knew he was going to tell Jim all about it anyway, why was he out here? He turned around and started back down the trail 

Jim looked up as he heard Blair turn back. That was a very short 'I've got to think' walk. 

"That has to have been the shortest 'I have to think walk' in history," Jim said as Blair knelt beside him. Blair smiled at him and kissed him. Jim sat there stunned as Blair's emotions flowed into him. There was a sense of elation overpowered by desire. And a sense of the love Blair felt for him embraced him. It overshadowed everything else. 

Blair could feel his surprise and ...gratitude? Yes, he had been afraid that I wouldn't come back, Blair thought. And Jim's love for him played over him like a gentle rain. 

They came up for air finally. As Jim started to initiate another kiss, Blair pushed him back. "We have to talk." 

"About what?" Jim asked breathlessly. 

"About me, my past, and your past, too," Blair said quietly. 

Jim pulled him into his lap. "Tell me about yourself, Blair," he whispered. Then he began to chuckle. Blair joined him, seeing the irony in the statement. 

Blair began to talk. He told Jim about the first time he had been molested. He had been seven and had nowhere to hide. He told Jim about the various gangs he had been in as a preteen and a teenager. He told Jim about the people his mother had left him with at various times in his life. He told Jim about the things he had seen on the street. About the beatings and the killing and the things he had done. Stealing stereos and picking pockets had been the limit for him, but he had seen other things go down. Had served as a lookout for various B&E's. He told Jim about the summers spent with Diana's grandmother. How those times where the only times he had actually felt safe, until he had met Jim 

By the time he had finished talking, it was getting dark. Jim just sat there for a few minutes rocking Blair. 

"Well?" Blair asked when the silence became too much for him to handle. 

"I think that you are the strongest person I have ever known," Jim said quietly. "And I love you very much." 

Blair started to cry. He felt so relieved to have finally told someone. 

"Hey, what's this?" Jim asked quietly. 

"I thought you would hate me. But you didn't. I am so happy," Blair said with a quivering smile. "Now tell me about you." 

"Compared with what happened to you, I had a supernaturally happy childhood. I was an only child of a couple who thought they could never have children. They both died in a car accident about five years ago. I went into the army right out of high school. The rest you know," Jim said. "Come on let's get some sleep." 

"O.K."   
  


* * *

A week later... 

Jim lay there holding Blair and marveled at his dreams. The link between them was growing stronger everyday. He could actually feel Blair's dreams and Blair said he could do the same. Sometimes their dreams actually melded together, and they shared dreams. 

In Blair's dreams there was almost always a white wolf. Either he was looking down at them in the dream sequence or actually participating with them. He had asked Blair about it, but Blair just shrugged and told him that the wolf had always been in his dreams. 

He felt Blair wake up and smiled. "How are you this morning?" Jim asked. 

"Just peachy," Blair said as he stretched and snuggled closer to Jim. 

"I've noticed," Jim said as he leaned down and nipped Blair's ear. He watched Blair smile sleepily and turn over. He began snore loudly. Jim grinned. So he wanted to play. 

He began to nip and kiss Blair's back. He was determined to explore every inch of it too, but once again their link defeated his purpose. Everyone of Blair's shudders and moans were echoed in Jim. Soon he had to stop and catch his breathe. 

A plan formed. He got the lube from the night table and squeezed some out on to his finger. Then he turned his dial down as far as it would go. Then he began working a finger into Blair. 

He smiled as Blair began to arch into him. He could still feel Blair's sensations but not nearly as intensely. He worked two fingers into Blair and began to rub his prostate. Blair moaned and tried to turn over. 

"Oh, no you don't," Jim whispered as he straddled Blair's legs and sat on them. "You were going to be cute and pretend to sleep,remember? That means I get to do all the loving." 

Blair groaned. He was so close. Then he felt Jim add a third finger. Oh gods, how was he able to keep this up. Usually, Jim would be groaning along with him right about now. Then Jim began to twist his fingers. All coherent thought was lost right about then. Blair could feel it building inside him. He arched back against Jim's fingers and sobbed with frustration when Jim put a hand on his ass to hold him down. Suddenly he came, fast and hard. 

Jim quickly lubed up. He pulled Blair back toward him and slowly pushed into Blair. He quickly concentrated and turned his dial back up. Blair jerked and shouted. Jim came almost immediately. 

They laid there panting. Jim slowly disentangled himself from Blair and collapsed beside him. 

Blair pushed up beside him and stared down at him. "I felt it. You fiddled with the dial." 

"Yep." 

"You just wait you'll get yours," Blair collapsed. "After I catch a nap." 

Jim just laughed.   
  


* * *

  


"Are you going to tell me why you don't like me, or do I have to guess?" Diana said as she dug into her calzone. 

"Why do you think I don't like you?" Daryl shot back as he toyed with his spaghetti. 

"Because I'm white, because you think that if you don't like me, you're father won't fall in love with me," Diana put down her fork. "Let's get something straight. I love your father. I want to love you, Daryl because you are your father's son. But we don't have to like each other. We just have to make your father happy. Simon wants us to get along. So let's just get along." 

"Yeah, let's."   
  


* * *

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